Friday, January 04, 2008


Giuliani Mulls Adopting Cheney

Fed up with what he calls his "highly ungrateful children," Rudy Giuliani hinted yesterday that he might consider adopting Vice President Dick Cheney if he is selected as the Republican nominee.

Pressed to clarify, Giuliani acknowledged that he might like to select Cheney as his running mate. "It's a type of adoption. Actually, Cheney would be adopting me. He would guide me and flatter me and tear up the Constitution, just as he has for the current President."

Giuiliani said that he hopes to develop a familial relationship with the Vice President. "That's just the way I am. You get close to me, and we're family. You piss me off, and I dump you, just like I do my family."

Giuliani's children said only "Good riddance" when asked about their father's upcoming family planning.

Whew! There is a wretched stench coming from that stroller.... that baby needs changing!
Happy New Year. My New Year's wish is to never see Cheney's mug again. Please, please spare us, Lulu! Okay, for you, I make an exception. Where the hell has he been anyway?
In the hidden bunker of his mean little mind...
Where's Cheney?
He dusted his hands off last year and said, "Okay, I met my goal of giving Halliburton $500 billion. If anyone needs me I'll be taking a nap."
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