Wednesday, October 31, 2007


It's Waterboarding, Not Apple Bobbing

You have to admire Michael Mukasey's academic integrity on the question of whether waterboarding can be defined as a form of torture.

Mukasey has dodged the questions of the Senate Judiciary Committee on the practice, saying that he doesn't have the security clearance for making an informed statement. That's telling 'em, Mike!

Sometimes I wonder how people like Patrick Leahy keep from exploding during confirmation hearings. The issue of waterboarding, after all, starts at the top, like every other assault on the Constitution, Geneva Conventions, and human decency. Asking these questions must be the height of absurdity.

Dubya wasn't going to select a Petraeus who wasn't going to bullshit Congress, nor a Mukasey who won't play along with the assembled chickenhawks.

If Mukasey wants to buy a little credibility for a whiz-bang finish to the hearings, he ought to head down to Guantanimo and experience a little waterboarding for himself. Then he can lay the question of whether or not it's torture to rest on an experiential basis.

Actually, since our Commander-in-Chief has such cojones grandes, we should probably start with him. I'm sure it wouldn't faze him a bit. He and El Cheney could go on a field trip.

Now there's something that definitely should start at the top.

Ooooh! SMACK! And he thought he could get away with a polite, "no comment, I don't know enough about waterboarding torture".

From the words of the Commander/Decider himself- he's either fer it or against it.

Get your Axis (of evil) together.

As for the cojones, muy pocito, that is why he is compensating for something with the superpower complex, Eh?
What the hell is he wearing?
That's genuine waterboarding sportswear... Bush thinks that soon everyone will want some, and Halliburton will start peddling it in a catalog.
In light of this controversy, we must stick to our predilection for water-somethinging and institute bobbing for apples instead. We could aggravate, not torture, but aggravate the prisoners by putting in rotten apples or apples with razor blades or even substituting apples for eyeballs or something. Then it would serve its purpose and still be viewed worldwide as a game that even children love to play.
If I were in charge of torture, I'd force terrorists to watch ABC's "CAVEMEN" non-stop while being forced to eat those new deep fried mac n' cheese nuggets they sell at Sonic or somewhere.
Then I'd make them stand in line at Walmart the day after Thanksgiving when they have DVD players on sale for $16.82.
Then I'd make them watch a DVD of Celene Dionne doing it with her husband Rene Angelil while being serenaded with Shakespeare soliloquys delivered by Reba McEntire and Larry the Cable Guy.
I think KZ's comment just made me ill.

But I love the post..can I repost it at Sirens?
Sure, Dusty. Help thyself.
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