Monday, October 02, 2006


Foley Explains "Huge Misunderstanding": Thought He Was IMing Bush

Former Congressman Mark Foley offered an explanation to Republican leaders regarding his sexually explicit emails: he thought he was instant messaging President George W. Bush, a man he describes as a "buff hunk, and certainly of the age of consent."

"It's all a huge misunderstanding," said Foley to reporters. "The immature phrasing, the social awkwardness in the messages--I thought it was the Commander in Chief."

Foley said that he was drawn to the President's butch appearance, which sources say is attributable to the Chief Executive's ingestion of massive amounts of testosterone. "I thought he'd be up for some real guy talk, you know, about being hard and horny and ready for action. I had no idea I was IMing a teenager. Talk about embarrassing."

"I do think of the President as totally hot, and I would love to hold his towel for him any old time," Foley added, referring to the message that he thought he was sending to Mr. Bush. In the meantime the Department of Justice was looking for a legal basis to charge Foley with triggering bipartisan revulsion.

The President, who was on a 25 mile bike ride, was not available for comment.

The pretzelnut can ride 25 miles?
I knew there was an innocent explanation for all this.
There are more fags in the GOP than a half off sale at Pottery Barn.
Not for long, if today's Alternet purge story is accurate.
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