Wednesday, July 26, 2006


Now It's My Turn to Write about Her Turn

A few weeks ago my long-time friend (as opposed to longtime companion... we've never Done It) Karen Zipdrive was nyah-nyah-nyahing the poor sales of Mary Cheney's book, Now It's My Turn. Not too long after Karen's un-compassionate, un-conservative tirade, a snarky review in the New York Times Book Review weighed in on the volume's deficiencies.

Well!I was raised in Orange County, California, where I learned at my mama's knee the nature of the basically wicked nature of the Liberal Media, so I determined to give the lass a chance, though one that wouldn't cost me any money. (Mary, after all, received a million dollar advance, whereas I now work for $11.03 an hour.) I went down to my friendly local bookstore and found the copy, not in the desperately remaindered pile for $2.98 as I'd hoped (Zippy DID say that the book's sales were miserable), but on the corner of a table in a big stack.Mary's rich relatives are probably threatening the publishers with expanded executive branch powers in order to keep the book from being shredded.

But I digress. Once I hunkered down with this volume, I learned all sorts of important things:
Her father is a man of Honesty and Integrity;
John Edwards fusses with his hair too much;
She and her dad have a lot of quality father-daughter moments shooting animals and stuff, here and abroad;
Her parents don't believe the same stuff as the other Republicans on the subject of gay people;
Her family just wants her to Be Happy.

All I can say is Wow. No wonder she got her own book, and she didn't even mention that her partner was a transgendered Dustin Hoffman, as you can see above. (I wondered what had happened to him. Don't you believe that nonsense about playing field hockey together in college.) Wotta read!

Run, don't walk, to your favorite book store to read Mary's memoir for free in the little designer coffee cafe that's appended to most bookstore these days. Save your money for the iced mocha with whipped cream on top. Remember, Mary's already got her million buck advance, and she doesn't really need the money. Not with Halliburton's profits what they are.

I thumbed through a copy of that book a repugnican friend of mine bought.
What a piece of crap from Mr. Dana Carvey.
I'd like to beat her head in with a copy of it.
...and her girlfriend needs a Weedwhacker to thin out those ghastly eyebrows.

P.S. We almost did it.
Dana Carvey?? Whaaa... did I miss something?
Damn..for some reason I just can not buy that book or spend an appreciable amount of time perusing it. I would rather gouge out my eyeballs with a plastic fork.
Oh dusty, I dunno. I think I'd rather read Mary's Book than L'il Annie Coulter, who recently received her PhD in Psychology and has diagnosed Bill Clinton as GAY. GAY, mind you.
Well, if the liberals can have their own religion and all, I spoze Bill can have the hots for ...for..for.. Ann Coulter, who, after all, is a guy...
I think Mary Cheney looks like Dana Carvey.
Also- I gotta wonder which one is more butch--Mary or Heather?
I'll bet they fight for the top.
God, she does look like dana..scary..

the coultergeist is a guy but a very docile one when I saw her friday going up against david sirota on cnbc..I almost shat myself when she said the dems will win the house in nov.
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