Friday, April 07, 2006


Only Connect

Following up on a personal request from Tom DeLay, who wanted to hammer out one more agreement before entering the criminal justice system, TV psychologist Dr. Phil has intervened in the escalating hostility between Donald Rumsfeld and Condoleeza Rice.

Reminding the pair, "You don't have to have bad manners to swim in Lake Jackass," Dr. Phil strapped the two into his therapeutic couch in an effort to save the administration he supports.

"Remember, in this administration nobody has gone to war, so it only makes sense that Condi hasn't," he said, wagging a bejeweled finger at Rumsfeld. "It should be a uniter among you, not a divider. You don't need sergeant's stripes to pull rank."

To Rice he offered, "It's important to stand by all your men. Don't slice into those tender testicles. You don't need a course in astrophysics to poop on a cracker."

The pair have planned a trip to each other's home towns in order to kick up a little Jack Straw magic.

"jack straw magic"..o my god...never happen :P
What if it's a quantum cracker?
Isn't a jackstraw something like a cheesestraw one serves at sissy tea parties?
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