Thursday, March 02, 2006

 

I Wonder if She'll Notice

What's better than one billionaire standing in for another? And this one comes, not only with a rug (admittedly thinning, but with lots of technical support to keep the combover in place) but with a shiny new wife.

Melania would make a great stand-in second lady. She's used to hanging out with rich men who regularly sport unpleasant facial expressions, and with that bored squint of her own, it might be months before she realizes that The Donald has morphed into The Dick.

The Dick, having married his high school sweetheart and former baton champion of the state of Wyoming, could probably use a little variety. After all, alpha males have to have a little change of camel toes now and then. This variety would be repackaged as the thanks of a grateful nation.

Lynne Cheney could take some time off and write another hot frontier novel with lesbian overtones, or maybe another piece of faux patriotism for the little ones. I'm sure that she could use a change, too. Maybe Jeff Gannon has a few spots open on his dance card.

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