TakeYourMedicine

In a stunning coup, retail giant Wal*Mart has retained the services of Vice President Dick Cheney in its new public relations campaign which will restore the reputation of the embattled firm. Cheney will not only lend the credibility of his office to Wal*Mart, he will serve as a creative consultant as well.

"I hope to do for Wal*Mart what I have done for the country," Cheney declared.

Cheney has wasted no time. In a bold move he has done away with the traditional Wal*Mart vest, replacing it with the version he is modeling here.

"With the savings from this simple fashion update, Wal*Mart will be in a position to improve its healthcare offerings to employees.

Savings will go to the Wal*Mart health employee plan, which will provide each associate with a Care Bag filled with wellness aids, such as Flintstone's Chewable Vitamins, rubbing alcohol, Equate aspirin, and antibacterial towlettes.